Friday, January 5, 2007

my man, Johnny

Johnny Cash once talked about his life before he found God. With a face like that, you knew it was no picnic. He talked about his burning addiction to drugs and alcohol, and how he felt he wasn’t worth a dime. He just didn’t see any way out and drove alone to the desert. Discouraged, he crawled into a dark cave and laid down, just waiting to die. Hours later, he realized he really wanted to live and he walked out of the cave and signed into rehab.

I didn’t know why I came to the desert alone. Lost love had sent me on an unexpected journey. Looking back, I realize that I wanted to see if my heart would stop, just like that.

I drove thousands of miles watching the clouds cross the wide-open plains. I watched skies change color from morning ‘till night. I didn’t talk to anyone and nobody talked to me. I never did lay down in a cave, and my heart never stopped.

Johnnie never knew it, but we were kin. We both became different people in the desert. When you think you are going to die, I believe that sometimes you do. And, sometimes you don’t. Maybe DNA forces you to go on, or maybe God has a different plan. What I do know, is that last year Johnnie took another chance and laid down to die, and this time he didn’t get up.

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